Saturday, 31 March 2007
Tinkin abt wat happen 2day... i juz duno wat 2 say.... mayb i was tinkin alot abt my past or mayb i juz missin 'Him'.... But i dun wan to kol or mgs him.... juz wanna b forgotten him in my life.... mayb he oso do e same...... Im not regretin it but i juz being concern.... but i noe dat i can't get it right coz i did hurt him n i noe dat all i wanna say or speak will make him laugh @ me...... or will make him wanna puke.... i was happy in my present life wif my BF n dose around me..... A phase which dat i been tinkin " M i a burden to ani1 of u guyz?" A phase which i tink dat i shuldn't b tellin e others abt it.... Hmm..... Juz now meet him.... Decide go ECP (East Coast Park).... wearin a dress dat brought by him match wif black pants....... Quite nice i suppose n he keep praisin mi sayin" ur pretty ur pretty" ..... I say no im not..... haha..... i was blushing...... My 1st time goin out wif him @ nite.... usually go out wif him reach home b4 9pm......... Juz now reach home around 10 plus.... not so late but still ok..... hehe...... We were @ ECP wen we din realise dat it was 9.30 pm..... as i was promise mama n papa dat i go home b4 10 pm..... mgs my dad tell him dat im late......... While ridin still we realise it was oradi 10pm so he ride the bike so fast till 120cc.... Fuh...... @ last reach home safely......... So tired..... hmm...... 2molo werkin @ 10 am.... my last day of werk...... good luck for my others friend....... im sorie never tell u guys but aniwae, b happy always n b stay healthy..... haha.... 2 my guy, mayb we nvr made much time in the future but juz wanna tell u dat u will b in my heart always k? -RaYu- 12:06 am
Monday, 26 March 2007
Pagi2 lagi dah angun kul 7 pagi... haiz.... betullah penat mcm rasa malas pulak nak angun... dala bapak aku kejut mcm nak rak... ade dia g haha... =) tap takpelah aku angun aje... coz i got 2 go 2 Dover ITE 2 make payment 4 my skul 'tings'... Den nak beli baju tak dpt coz aku tak keluar kan duit... haha =) apalah... sok peg lagi.... haiz... After g skul... my dad drop mi n my mum 2 e MRT (Bouna Vista)... REach oradi den i was like blur n oni realise dat we r actuali standin @ e wrong TRACK!!! e track which go 2 pASIR RIS...Huahaha... =) Luckily we haven board up the MRT... hAIZ... dAH sampai kt Fajar den we eat @ MacDonald.... eatin breakfast as my stomach gettin itchin for hunger... haha... BuY hotcakes wif sausage & e $2 sausage muffin.... hehe.... kol mi sis 2 come down without mi auntie (Bibik Ita)... haha.... Jahat seh... eatin alone... haha.... =) dat time iz e tme for mi lil sis 2 go 2 skul....... after a few mintues mi sis n lil sis cme n was shoutin callin my name.... Kak Ayu... Kak Ayu..... haha..... Den mi mum take Nana go skul.. left mi n sis (Nani) eatin e food while waitin for mi mum 2 cme bck.... Eat finish den went home... Ngok tv crita (Kasih Suraya)... Nice drama but 2 slow.... hmm....
Watch2 n watch till i felt asleep.... hmm... ol of e sudden feel tired... haiz.... today not werkin as i was goin 2 the skul 2 pay e bill 4 my skul fees... haha.... hmm..... duno y tiz feelin keep tinkin abt e past... it juz dun wan 2 go away.... haiz.... i juz nid him 2b by my side always... Hmm... but wat 2 do... mayb tak jumpa dgn dia for how many days.... i goin to quit @ KFC n started werkin @ Takashimaya..... hmm.... wonder how m i goin thru tiz without him by my side..... he did say dat i achieve my goal 1st n he oso..... but izzit goin 2b long????? How i misses him every minutes, every second n every hour....... Oni HE noes abt my feelin rite now..... haiz..... juz wish him dat he b safe always.... I will always wait for u Muhd Khair Bin Abdul Rahman..... N I LOVE U..........
-RaYu-
2:57 pm
Wednesday, 21 March 2007
Too damn tired today.... but wat 2 do.... 2molo still got another day 2b DOOM!!! Hahaha.... =p But 2molo start @ 12nn so can relax abit... Yessa!!! Mood 2day up & down coz i was so fed up wif ol the people n of course dat new manager.... Sir Ram....like ssseeerrraaamm!!! huahaha..... Tak pasal2 kena mara dgn aku seh... kecian seh... Haiz.... pe leh buat dia uat psl dgn aku.... dalah 2 org je uat base den he expect us 2 go n eat wen dare's alot of tings 2 do.... Wat e F*** Siak! .... werk till 5pm but ol the tings haven done so nid 2 finished it up even u dun wanna 2.... Wat 2 do!!! Auntie Hariyanti alik @ 5 den leave mi alone doin ol the tings dat nid 2 handover.... Haiz.... top up mayonaise, cut spring onion, pack coleslaw n whipped potato.... @ last ok but i tink Sir T.G ask 2 make the whipped potato but coz i hav been stay @ 5 till 6.30pm so he lend mi go.... He so shocked dat i finished @ 5 actually...
Meet Azriah at last for the last 2 hours of waitin.... haiz..... at last free......... We walk home... B4 dat i was buyin a guava den saw tiz face so familiar.... Den i say to Az..." tad tu fauzi kan?" She tak perasan so aku uat bodoh je.... walk2..... we tok ,we laugh, till reach my house..... haiz..... So damn tired but still can sit down n chat wif az summo.... till my mum sound dat i shuld b bathin... haha.... after bathin... i cook fried maggi 4 azriah.... haha.... main hembus je.... put fishcake, hotdog, vegetables, chilli n onion... haha.... =p
On fri, go out wif him.... yessa! can't wait for it..... Btw, i miz u abg....... Haha.... Kla... Till here den...
-RaYu-
9:30 pm
Monday, 19 March 2007
Hmm... Dun really feel like sleeping now... Juz can't go 2 sleep tiz days... duno why... Always wake up arnd 2 - 3 plus in the mornin.... den if wanna slip back cannot.... its juz dun seem rite.... Hmm... If wake up in the mornin arnd 8 - 9 plus it still so sleepy.... den go 2 werk n at werk feel like bullshit... coz doin tings like a mad dog... walk here walk dare...haissh... Got 1 more week 2 go till i off 2 the new werin life... TAKASHIMAYA!!!!! Here i come...... Gee........
Hmm..... duno why tiz feelin come so lonely wen im not wif him dat day..... on saturday, 17.03.07..... hmm...... feel lonely wen not wif him........ c bro n ruzi......... ana n faiz......... haiz.... tinkin abt wat happen during the past..... saturday outing was not meant for him actually..... hmm...... do my own tings like being happy to make myself busy but cnnt coz im feelin abit tired dat day...... not enough sleep.... wking up in the early mornin like in 2am 3 am....? haiz.... cant go back 2 sleep dat time......... Keep tinkin why? why? mayb juz mine imagination.... or mayb dares tings dat will b happenin....? Hmm....... but it's true as i suggested coz im feeling alone dat time n i cant b tokin 2 bro or the rez but so im juz mgs him on the phone keep callin him........ wish him could b here but can't...... Hmmm..... it's juz can't b happenin......... Keep tinkin wen it goin 2 end but it will make my brain crack....... juz dun wan 2 tink abt it................. at last i did hav fun but not so dat fun..... but it's enough 2 make mi feel dat im ok......... even it's not ok............... Only God noes wat is in my mind dat time................. =(
Got another suprise ting.............. I GET DOVER ITE !!!!!!!! Yes2....... glad juz 2 glad............ haha............ On 26 March nid to come down 2 pay the fees 4 the exam papers, the skul tings sum sort like dat........ hmm...... But $150 ware can i get the $$$$ ?????? hmm..... mayb can apply 4 financial assistance 4 dat..... haha......... Juz can't believe dat i got into Dover...... if i din ask 4 transfer mayb i can't get it......... fuh......... wat a relief!!!! =) haha........ Actually got sumtin in mind dat i wanna go Dover....... It'z kind of secret coz itz oni mi noe it..... haha.... so others xcept my family, my loved ones n friends may fuckoff...... huahaha........ Kla till here den....
-RaYu-
10:12 pm
Tuesday, 13 March 2007
2 days nver blog in... Got 2 much to say but i wil make it short & simple... 2day werk as base wif Sis Nora... open shop oradi dden got crowd n we did jam the ting... burger la... coz the oil is not hot enough n e tempature is low... Sis Nora do e job n Maam do help us doin all the cooking... haiz... Do the base was so tiring n i feel all my body was tensed up.... haha... till the time wanna to hand over the whipped potato... e gravy not enough i make uh... 3 pkt done... Sumtin bad happen wen i wanna wen back to base... the floor was wet n my shoe was sliperly n i was losing control n i fall down... thus the gravy was being splash into my cap, shirt, the wall... duno how the gravy can splash till like dat... haha... so funny wen tink abt it... i slipped den i was in pain coz my knee hit the floor n my hands kena the hot gravy... argh....... maam, auntie swadren help me... Malu seh depan customer lagi... haha... i was laughin to myself of being so clumsy... n dat wasn't e 1st time dat i fall down... haha... but good lah coz i get to rez for awhile at the same time eat my essay... haha... so i guess it hit at one stone...haha... =pGet mgs from my bro... At 1st i thought hu seh... den i read the mgs again... "didi"... dat y i noe dat iz my bro... muhd zaidi bin rahim... haha... im impressed wif u bro dat ur loved again... i noe it hard for u to give mi ur blessing as wat i give it to u n ruzi but... i do hope dat u will change ur mind again... hehe...but i noe dat abg takkn n tkkn terima... n i dun blame u for dat... coz i understand it... N datza wat im asking u again... will u juz 4get abt it? if not den u wont b able 2 c e rayu... Mayb now she iz ok wif her life n she juz hope dat everything will b like last time... being together wif our LOVED ONES n FRIENDS oso FAMILY... She really wanna dat to happen eventhough itz hard but she still hoping for it... Hoping for u dat u will accept 'Him' as part of her life juz like she accept ruzi part of ur life... 2molo iz aonther new day for me... Juz wish it will b even better den 2day... haha... still laughing abt e incident dat happen wen i had a fall... =p Kla... dat all... wanna slip n hav a gud rez... A rez dat will make me wanna b alwayz in the happy mood dat will b foreva wat im now... No more cryin rahayu... ur big enough 2 tink abt ur ownself... so juz b wat iz rite for u n for the others ok? Till here den... Bye for now...-RaYu-Labels: Tears in my eyes...
8:52 pm
Sunday, 11 March 2007
HeLo...2Day im really got no mood plus got mood... u undertstand? Hmm... alot 2 tink abt.. i tink im goin 2b sick in less than 1 day... hmm... Can feel dat my body abit restless... I duno wat im feelin now... juz dun wan to tink abt wat dose guys say abt me... tell mi wat would u do if ur in my shoes? Wen people were 2 tok abt u juz bcoz dat i juz made a stupid mistake... do they noe wat im goin thru last time... a decision dat i made 4 breaking up wif my guyz (khair)... do they really noe wat im tinkin at the point of time...? my mind was mixin wif other feeling... argh... i noe dat they r concern abt my guy... they afraid dat he will b hurt again by any girls... 4 a sec i tink was i dat bad? dat they wanna him 2 go distance away frm mi? my heart was hurt dat time... but i juz let it flow... juz dun wanna 2 spolit the mood... haiz... Get 2 noe dat bro (zaidi) has began 2 luv her (ruzi)... wish them best of luck n i giv my blessing for them... though i admit dat it will b diff wen the next time we met... but i juz wish them best of luck... hehe... he shuld b happy n i prayed to god dat he will always b fine eventhough i wasn't dare wif him... Coz i noe dat sum2 will take care of him for mi if i wasn't dare... n im sure dat he will b fine n always b happy juz like last time... I LoVe U BrOthEr... tankz 4 everything... we shall b brosis TILL end of time rite...? Even i noe dat i will not b blessing from u but i noe dat 1 day u will accept it sooner or later... I mean u will accept him... but not now... To my beloved, khair... i will always b tinkin of u no matter wat... dose promises i will keep n i will wait for u 2 come my dear... I LUV U KHAIR......!!!!!! We will together build up the relationship ok till end of time... kla... gtg... nid to signed out... hehe... will the day b even more better then today... Muackz...-RaYu-Labels: ToDaE hAv FuN WiF hIm...
10:57 pm
Thursday, 8 March 2007
Hai dearly... =)
Wake up arnd 8.30 am... Still very sleepy but wat 2 do still hav 2 wake up... coz nid to go 2 werk ... start at 10 am...hmm... so tidy up my bedroom, take a shower wif my 2 little brats... hehe... nola my 2 little cutey sister (nana & shasha) =p iron my clothes & get ready 2 dress up... hmm... arnd 9.25 am went out 2 werk... Reach dare arnd 9.45 am... i thought i do cashier but no im doin base... i was like WHAT??? But still can do so help auntie hariyanti do whipped potato till finish abt 2 tray in side n 2 tary 4 outside... after dat do coleslaw packed another 4 tray tripple layer... haiz... so tiring...
Not muh crowd but still can TAHAN LA... Coz got student crowd... Still can manage it... haha... In the mornin got AM(area manager) come wanna check all the product... So far i juz clean up the place as well as auntie haryanti... Wen the AM went inside... she praises us dat we manage 2 keep the place clean n tidy... hehe how's dat??? great rite... haha... After she go oradi... Sir T.G.tell us wat the AM say n he wanna put me in2 supply base... Argh.... no3... no at all... i dun wan... hmm... Arnd 4 plus not 2 many customer... i was ask to take over auntie Faridah coz she nid to back fetch her daughter back... while waitin 4 khairul 2 cme... hmm... Dat time i eating my essay... shroom n whipped potato... Take counter 4 awhile till 5.30 pm...
Khairul come & im back 2 my side.... Datz iz supply base...haha... Stay dare till 6 pm den im chao coz all the hand over i done oradi... hmm... so wait the time to let me off... Juz wanna get out of the werk.... got missed kol from him... he say dat he can book out 2day... yes3.... terlongjat2 aku dibuatnya... bestnya dia ambil kita... Rindu agt kat dia seh... haha... i luv u khair... dia anta ayu alik rumah but at the same time b4 dat we go 2 pasar mlm... c wat we wanna buy but it nothin... go dare wif ah fang... hehe... kla... gtg... till here den..
-RaYu-
8:15 pm
Wednesday, 7 March 2007
Elo...wakin up a little late... around 9am mayb... hmm... but still feel wanna sleep 4eva till i died...opps! sorie guys... haha... so wake up n tell my mum abt the werkin ting... Wanna go there ourselves or not like tok to the person-in-charge sum sort like dat... Soon abt 11 am we went out 2gether wif nana & shasha... bring them along as they are not feelin well... esp. shasha...=( she not feelin well tiz few dayz & her asthma attack again at nite... hmm...so juz takin them along wif us go 2 takashimaya... hehe... 1st time takin my mum go jln2 jauh seh... haha... so we ride on the LRT & alight at Phoenix den take bus 190... reach dare at takashimaya go to the shop ware i suppose 2 werk... but the person is not dare so juz my luck...hmm... =( look at my mum face like oradi like tapai baci... haiz... wish dat i wasnt go 2 dat place... & do a stupid mistake... hmm... was it wrong if i were 2 search 4 other job or quit at KFC...? other can like most of e guys whomwerk at KFC B4 has quit once they get their licence motor... werk as a rider... a pizza rider... hmm... but mi cannot? muz wait till 1 month den can quit... like stupid siak... Another 1 more months dat i gonna start skul 4 the higher nitec at tampines... tink im ready for the change or not... i juz duno... feel dat doesnt wan to c any1 face esp. 'him' or 'her'... juz dun wan to look dat face again... if mgs can la coz cant c the face so if i cry people wont noe rite? I noe dat my heart cant really take it but wat can i do? Wanna ask for transfer at dover tink like wastin time... at e same time scared if my appli. cannot accept... so wat shuld i do?Haiz... problem3... yyyyyyyyyyyyy??????????? Tok 2 my parent till they get fed-up wif me... At last im being blame for wat i do... Fed-up! Fed-up! Fed-up! ....Rahayu... Rahayu... Rahayu... tink Rahayu tink.... it's time dat i grown up gerl... haiz... kla gtg... blog in again next time...-RaYu- 6:49 pm
Friday, 2 March 2007
Hey hey... feel so bored... how am i suppose 2 do wif my own probs... haiz... wanna quit KFC den werk at takashhimaya... at the same time skulin... Werk oni part time at there... hmm... wanna transfer at dover but it is such a hassle so i tink no nid 2 transfer dare la... oh god y m i feelin thiz way...? Y makin a decision dat will make urself trouble? Y didn't tink abt the consequences... hmm... now i being trapped by my own probs... haiz... i cant turn back n i hav 2 face it by my own... tiz iz my life n im e 1 hu created it so i goin 2 solve it in others ways... hmm... help me pls...........
Now another probs dat i been tinkin lately... abt my fren's gatherin...hmm... i wanted 2 bring along khair but bro didn't let me... Wat shuld i do? shuld i let him go wif me? or shuld i juz go by myself? If i wanna make him come wif me, bro wil not b happy and im not a heartless person 2 c people tat i once loved being angry wif wat i done rite? if like dat i guess i wil nvr b able 2 bring all my friends back together... hmm... im such a failure... Yes i am... hmm... At times i wonder was i in the group or not? Shuld i b jealous? b angry? b happy? coz my pictures is not dare wif them? A decision which i made is not wat they wana heard from me... n i made a decision which was comin from my heart... Was tat wrong of me? hmm... i noe that i shuld b makin my own decision my own choice... i shuld b tougher den b4... Bro, y u makin mi feel sorry for wat i done? why u always make wanna cry? i juz hate 2b cryin abt u again... really i juz dun wan 2 cry animore... =(
For my love... Muhd Khair...tiz iz wat i hav for u... juz takkaires wareva ur... I do know dat u trust me always n i do trust u too... I will always remember wat u say.... dose three words... faith... trust... has given mi alot of hope dat i don even notice dat i shuld b tinkin of u everyday coz i noe i can trust u n it is keep inside my heart... N i do love u now,then n forever n forever...i will keep u in my heart always... Yes if we do trust each other we may b movin forward n shall b always b together to face all difficulties... n i trust u dat we can b more den wat we are now... For now let us pray 2 for the better...hmm...
Kla till here den... Toodles... =)
-RaYu-
4:47 pm
